tubby-lil-chubby-girl asked: Hi, Mr. Vinnie! I hope you are well. :) I was wondering what your thoughts were on long distance DDlg relationships? I apologize if this is something you've already covered in a FAQ or something. Thank you and have a good day. :)
Hello and welcome to my blog! I have written about LDR DD/lg relationships quite a bit.
I am not a fan.
DD/lg relationships are very intense and require utmost trust and respect That’s hard to develop from long distance. There are too many variables that interfere with trust, too many assumptions people have to make when they are long distance that do not lead to trust. The intensity of an online relationship (which can be very intense for many reasons, mostly having to do with expectations that aren’t altogether real) combined with the intensity of a DD/lg relationship is enough to make most of them implode in very little time.
READ CAREFULLY: I am not in favor or against Long Distance DD/lg Relationships.
READ CAREFULLY: I realize that some people can pull off LDRs and some people have trouble with them time and time again. That has nothing to do with the LDR itself. It has to do with the people involved.
READ CAREFULLY: A lot of people involved in LDRs are involved because they are desperate for something! And they’re too shy or have issues with meeting people in person, so they get the “next best thing.” Yeah, that doesn’t work. Also, a lot of people aren’t super honest with themselves about their levels of trust and intimacy in a relationship, and at the first sign of trouble, they start freaking out.
READ CAREFULLY: Many people aren’t self-honest and engage in online relationships rather than confront their abilities to have an in-person relationship. In fact, they aren’t honest with others and that leads to problems in online relationships.
Self-honesty, a balanced self, a full life, ultimate honesty and transparency and openness with your partner and your self - these lead to good relationships, whether in person or long distance.
This is obviously only my two cents. I do not need a lot of letters telling me that you or someone has a good LDR. They are out there. I know that. And I applaud those who can have a good LDR honestly.
But I get a massive amount of email from both Daddies and littles about the problems of LDRs, from people who are in LDRs. If that’s not something to think about and go by, I don’t know what is.
I hope this helps!
- Daddy Vinnie